BEFORE: Vergara aggressive with every single member of JKO she can lay hands on: pushing Jeri Ryan at one press conference; shouting and being angry with Kelly Brook at another; shoving and shrieking with Upton herself at weigh-ins. "JKOs are bullees," Sofia contends at podium. "Everyone knows thees. And the only reason they are feeding me Kate Upton is because Jeri Ryan is afraid to face me herself! I weel SMASH Kate! She weel suffer as Jeri and Kelly look on in wonder!" Upton unimpressed: she lays it out for the press in rebuttal: "Look, here's the news: I'm like 20 years younger than Vergara. Get outside her chest and I'm bigger and more robust. There is no WAY this old broke-down hag gets over on me. I'm swinging for the fences guys, and when she goes out? I can't promise you that nothing bad will happen after. She's pushed us all just a little too hard for me to make a promise like that!" Sofia in white bikini as per:
white gloves; long black hair in gypsy ringlets.
Kate in hard to describe blue bikini, but it's this: http://img262.imagevenue.com/img.php?image=099513523_Kate44_122_510lo.jpg
During R1: Stumbling, slugging action early as girls push/heave in haymakers - jugs a-sloshing side to side, eyes flashing, lips curled back off ivory teeth. Senseless mayhem - girls missing or grazing with wild wallop when midway through - CRASHING right hand finds Upton's jaw as she's liftiing in a wide right of her own...BLONDE GIRL DOWN! Kate's right knee gives way, spilling her down and to her right in a belly-sprawl...ref having to body a shrieking Sofia V back as she's hollering spanish epithets. Blonde girl whimpering, pushing up off her chest, looking shellshocked...she rises, backs into ropes for a trembling 8. ON COMES VERGARA! Sofia teeth bared, hands at chest as she squares up strong: she dips torso-left to clap the right upside Kate's head...blonde's hands wilt, eyes go glassy as she sways back into ropes. Sofia twists into left hook, kissing it across Katie's mouth, then Vergara's reaching under Kate's arms, chesting her up against ropes, sorting her out, then PLOWING UP BLONDE RACK! OH THE HUMANITY! Sofia slopping in a right across jug, following through with forearm: Kate gurgling, head bobbling, her left arm draping drowsy around Sofia shoulders as Vergara presses in close on follow through. Vergara squirming, pushing Kate back flat to ropes again: Sofia plows in the left forearm, crushing the wind from Katie's lungs...poor blonde girl groans, draping her RIGHT arm limp around Sofia's shoulders and girls momentarily compress. Vergara in rhythm now - pushing to stack, then slopping home righty to jug...poor Kate can only groan; do a half-roll to loop her left arm across Sofia's shoulders, grunting in pain as Sofia packs a tight left hand deep to belly. That's the way of it - Sofia atop Kate - propping her up as necessary to prevent blonde from going down; staying on those jugs with full-bodied wallop. Bell: Sofia laughing in blonde girl's spellbound face...Kate half asleep, moaning from jug-ache - ref has to pull Colombian bully off her prey as Kate stumbles shabby to corner.
R2: Upton's young legs prove resilient - she shakes off a lot of harm, comes out relatively refreshed to close with Vergara midring. Stiff jab pre-empts Sofia - Kate baring her teeth as she pokes it in there, knocking back Vergara's head and spoiling brunette haymaker. Katie steps back, circles to her left, steps in with the long left jab - tall blonde girl showing a little Jeri Ryan class as she punches Sofia's face, pre-empting brunette power. Vergara angered, regrouping...she pours herself up the middle with screeching ferocity: blonde girl rolls under a swinging Vergara right, answers back a rising right deep to belly: SOFIA'S HURT! Vergara gut-punched up onto her tippy toes...she totters forward into Kate's arms; blonde girl wraps left arm around brunette shoulders, starts plowing righty-to-gut while marching Vergara back into ropes. Sofia agonized - eyes shut tight, mouth open wide: Kate puts Colombian butt on cables, packs the tummy full of pumping rights, bunching Sofia up in a bad way. Upton reaching under Sofia's arms, chesting her upright to stack: Kate's got Sofia ragdoll on ropes and it's PAYBACK TO RACK TIME! Vergara whining as Kate helps herself...blonde girl in close, cramming away lefts and right forearms until groggy Vergara can tie up around blonde shoulders. Kate's still got forearms crossed against Sofia's chest in snug...blonde legs DRIVE Upton forward, compressing Vergara deep to ropes as poor brunette can only groan in pain. Kate cackling as she pushes in, compressing jug - her buns and legs working hard to get weight forward into Vergara. Sofia's head lolling back and forth, face stricken - technically she's tying up, but she can't stop the hurt! Raucous chest compression loosens Sofia to the point where Kate can wriggle free of the embrace...she's just atop Sofia, working out of busy, alternating wraps: Kate will slide left arm under Sofia's right to plow Vergara gut and jug free right hands, then switch to wrap righty and slug lefty. Poor Sofia groggy with harm; stacked and propped to prevent her taking a knee...Kate gets all her own back and then some as Vergara is a mumbling wreck by the bell.
R3: SOFIA'S STROKING KATIE! Vergara lifting punches up off her thighs, clapping Kate ear-to-chin down both jawlines...blonde girl staring spellbound, staggering around when smote...strong young legs holding her up as Vergara slops away. Sofia baring teeth, breasts heaving side to side as she walks Kate down and feeds her wallop. All Sofia Vergara helping herself and loving it until final minute...spellbound, groggy Kate stops her reeling backpedal, lifts right uppercut to Sofia's chin as Vergara's slopping another right to Upton's head1 Both girls wobble on the spot, each staring in wonder at the other...then Upton pulls a sloppy left across Sofia's jugs to turn the tide! Vergara open-mouthed, backing up...Kate staggering forward, lifting hands off her hips to slop then in and down to Sofia's jostling jubblies. Vergara hits ropes whining, head lolling...her hands reach around Kate's shoulders, but can't hug her tight...Upton's got room to squirm in punches! KATIE DEMOLISHING SOFIA'S RACK! Upton in close, but able to switch her shoulders side to side, plowing away lefts and rights across the bulge of Colombian jugs. Sofia blubbering, too hurt to tie up properly, her hands limp around Kate's shoulders...blonde girl can't be stopped! It's Upton on Sofia down the stretch - Upton plowing jug, teeth bared, blonde hair in her eyes as she works to shove and slop and REF STEPS IN! Sofia's head lolling back, baring her throat, she's out on her feet and official has no choice. TKO3 Kate Upton in spectacular fashion.
After: Mob scene at the ropes - every member of JKO (including Jeri; excepting ice-hotel bound Blake) stripped down into either fighting bikinis or bra-and-panties - moves in to separate official from Vergara: JKO girls all laughing and bubbly...poor Sofia whining/bewildered. Hands pulling and pushing at Sofia...crowd of girls pushing in on her...Vergara loses balance, and she's down, immediately swarmed by warm bodies/pulsing jugs.
Vergara writhing onto her side underneath the weight of Kate; grinning Kelly Brook lying atop Kate's back with weight on clasped hands/forearms beneath chest - the other Jeri's girls on their knees, pushing in close. Vergara able to wriggle onto her knees in a crawling bid for freedom: smiling Jenny Love Hewitt on her knees, moves in from Sofia's left shoulder, embracing her around the head/under right armpit to bull Vergara onto her right side. In comes Kate, In comes Jeri - the mass of tummies and jug squirming onto Vergara, muscling her to her back.
Sofia whining, overwhelmed...soon she's no longer able to writhe side to side off her back: she's got Chabert sitting in her belly; Kate squatting on her chest, crowding close with jug; Jeri lying atop Kate with weight on forearms, bouncing up and down; Hewitt squirming in from the side, knees digging into canvas for traction...the second Kate's grip loosens on Sofia, Jen's able to wriggle in there and apply jug from the side - the competition for Sofia always ensuring maximum snuggle.
Vergara able to squirm onto her belly, then get to knees-and-elbows, her tummy up off canvas - she's panting, trembling as Jeri's girls crowd in. Jenny Love on her knees, close on Sofia's left flank, facing Vergara's rear; Chabert on Sofia's right flank facing rear; Kate Upton in behind on her knees in between Sofia's legs...OH NO: LOW BLOWS! Jen pumping up and in with left arm - her bicep slapping against Sofia's thigh as her fist wraps up behind the glutes between the legs, Jen's right hand light atop Sofia's rump as Hewitt rams in close underneath; Chabert ramming in with her right - her shoulder and bicep slamming into Sofia's thigh as the fist shoots up past the glutes; Grinnin' Kate thrusting in righty when it's her turn - her shoulder ramming into Sofia's buns as Vergara shudders on the spot, jostling with the impacts. JKOs girls slamming away meaty in there, getting the job done with a brisk licking action of arms on loins. Reaming lather-action prompts Vanessa Hugens to tweet: "it's like a shoe-shine boy going at a boot with a towel! YAY!" Devastated Sofia flattens onto her belly, face pinched in stunned paralysis. Gleeful Jeri's girls high five each other on their knees, over top Sofia's trembling backside, then swarm in, bulling Sofia onto her back; sprawling upon her in a fleshy tide of shuddering buttocks, quivering tummies, throbbing racks, driving legs, brawny shoulders, sweat-shiny backs.
Keeley Hazell blinking in astonishment; Jennifer Ellison open-mouthed, staring; Brooklyn Decker staring, right hand at her throat; Gemma Atkinson; other big-jug beauties in the crowd...they know Vergara's getting the business because of her jug-threat; they wonder if they're on the same to-do list?
Overhead camera shows a mass of seething, rutting Jeri's girls pushing and writhing from all angles to put jug-on-face - strong backs, quivering buns, driving legs - all atop poor Sofia Vergara. Jenny Love and Lacey compete hip to hip, legs pumping, shoulders grinding as each tries to push the other off Sofia's face. Kelly grinds in beside Kate, pushing her aside and fixing jug to face, but the constant press of bodies and pulling hands soon pushes Kelly off, allowing Kate to squirm back on top. From north of Sofia's head, Hewitt pushes her arms inside Kate's arms, wriggling in to secure north/south jug-smother; from Sofia's left shoulder, Lacey burrows her arms in under Jenny's, levering her out of position and replacing Hewitts jugs with her own atop Sovia's face. Smilin' Kelly Brook plops down heavily atop Lacey's back - hands clasped at chest/arms under her body, adding her weight to Lacey's, even as Jeri's mounting a squirming offensive from Sofia's right shoulder.
When a girl is dislodged from Sofia, that girl looks vaguely cranky - sweaty hair disheveled and damp about her cheeks, her eyes all "hey, that was mine", lips parted as she pants for breath. Then she regroups and burrows back in, writhing to get more Vergara.
Poor Sofia just pushing on random bellies and hips, trying to roll out from under...there's just too much belly and jug to handle! Slowly but surely, juggiest latina on television is subjugated, her resistance eventually extinguished. The JKO girls still struggle atop their unresisting prey for dominance, but it's a more measured rut now - not the frenzied piggies-at-the-teat rutting it was at the start.
Eventually, when the JKO women pull back off the body, rising to their knees panting and flushed, looking down at their work...Vergara's in absolute jug-shock: eyes shut, mouth open, hands above her head...JKO girls couldn't be more pleased with themselves - hugging and slapping back/buns, glorying in the sight. Camera panning celebrities at ringside captures shellshocked, bleak, concerned expressions...Vergara as juggalicious as any celebrity in hollywood, and look at her now! All. Used. Up.
In days to follow, a triumphant Jeri Ryan explains the radical new approach to BLONDE! Magazine. "You know, at JKO, we had a pretty strict protocol in place for sharing spoils: winners had dibs; girls took turns, and I was generally satisfied with the results. But I saw a bit of complacency creeping in - I thought some of the beaten girls were getting off lightly, and by making my girls compete for jug-position, we got that intensity back. They were hungry again - they had to really want top position, and when they got it, they had to fight hard to hold it. We restored ferocity, and the results speak for themselves: Sofia Vergara was totally, completely extinguished - maybe even ruined. I'm not saying I'll unleash the "rut" every time out, but for special, prestige-opponents like Vergara...obviously I'm going to put that threat in the back of their minds!"
Message Thread | Skip to this response ↓
« Back to index