"Oh, this is all about Decker," says a snarling Cat. "How she HAS to hold serve against Swan by beating ME. Well, the world doesn't revolve around Brooklyn Decker, despite what that cow thinks, and I'm going to prove it by whipping her overrated a**!"
"It's kind of cute that Cat thinks she matters in any of this," says Decker, smiling sweetly. "This is all about me and Swan. Cat's just the pawn. And tonight, QxP. Queen takes Pawn."
O'Dell: "Back at ringside, and that's 'Cat Scratch Fever' by Ted Nugent and here comes Cat Deeley. Cat making her way into the ring, helped off with the robe to reveal that black number she favors and...out go the lights!"
Tess: "Wasn't that a song by Pat Travers..."
McCarthy: "Shut it, Walmart! I know where you're going with this!"
O'Dell: "Arena going silent here...and now starts to buzz as the laser show begins and strains of 'Also Sprach Zarathustra' boom across the sound system..."
McCarthy: "This is RIDICULOUS..."
Tess: "You're just angry you didn't think of it first..."
McCarthy: "Am NOT! I WANT the lights on when I come to the ring so the fans can see how HOT I am! I don't want to hide under cover of darkness like SHE does!"
O'Dell: "Decker into the ring, helped off with the robe, wearing that yellow bikini the boys like, and they're letting her KNOW they like it..."
McCarthy: "She's ANOTHER one who's lucky my dance card is about full! She's always on about how she's Front Street's top light! Torv's three times the fighter SHE is. I'd LOVE to work that overrated body she's so proud of!"
O'Dell: "Well, Mac, Tess is on record favoring Decker but not discounting a possible upset. What do you think?"
McCarthy: "I think Deeley's a much better boxer than Decker. And I think she's going to beat her!"
O'Dell: "Let's find out. There's the bell. And Cat immediately all about movement. Decker stalking, looking to close, but Deeley boxing behind that jab, sticking and moving..."
McCarthy: "Like I said, Deeley's a good boxer. If this thing goes rounds, she'll outpoint Decker."
O'Dell: "She's certainly doing that at the moment. Moving. Boxing. Decker giving up points to do recon."
Tess: "Decker clearly looking for a big shot. Not doing much except poking out a jab. Wants to take cat out of there."
O'Dell: "Not going to do it in the first. There's the bell and Deeley's got the round."
O'Dell: "Into the second, and, to quote Herman's Hermits, 'Second verse, same as the first'. Deeley moving, active, legging behind the jab. Decker stalking. Sticking the left out occasionally, but not doing much."
McCarthy: "She's looking for something big, Jenny, no question. But she's being out worked and out pointed. Cat fighting a very smart fight."
O'Dell: "Certainly is, Mac. Not mixing it up with Decker. All stick and move stuff and it's working to perfection. Decker not looking frustrated or particularly bothered, but Deeley's controlling things."
McCarthy: "This is how you get yourself in a hole on the cards."
O'Dell: "And that's just what she's done. Second round ends, and Deeley's got it and a 20-18 lead."
O'Dell: "Into the third now, and, again, it's Deeley controlling things from the outside. Decker stalking, but not doing much..."
McCarthy: "She's still loading up that right looking for a big shot..."
Tess: "You heard Decker pre-fight. This is all about SWAN. Swan stopped Deeley and that's what Decker is determined to do."
McCarthy: "Well, the way to go about it MIGHT involve HITTING her. Unless you expect her to slip on the primordial banana peel..."
Tess: "It's 'proverbial'..."
McCarthy: "WHAT is?"
Tess: "Heck with it. I'm impressed you KNOW the word 'primordial' even if you don't know how to use it..."
McCarthy: "I obviously know how to use it, Walmart! I just DID..."
O'Dell(sighing): "Deeley VERY slick tonight. Active. Moving. Sticking. Using her legs and quickness. Decker getting almost nothing done as the bell rings to end round three. And, Mac, you called it. Decker's in a hole."
McCarthy: "Every card at ringside's got to say 30-27, Cat. It's still early, but it's getting late."
O'Dell: "The fourth begins with Decker again stalking. Deeley sticking and moving, Brooklyn beginning to find the range with that piston left jab, that, as Tess points out, is becoming a staple of the Front Street big girls."
McCarthy: "Cat still busier. But Decker starting to land some heavier leather."
O'Dell: "Getting the jab working, she's opening up space for the right hand. Cat's movement is limiting those opportunities, but Decker's scoring more in this round than she has in the last three combined."
McCarthy: "Cat still showing angles, finding openings of her own."
O'Dell: "And a BLISTERING exchange at the bell! The best one of the fight, and Brooke got the better of it. I think she got the better of the round, too, Mac."
McCarthy: "It was close. Wouldn't want to count on it either way, but I think Decker's cut the lead to 39-37."
O'Dell: "We're into the fifth now, and Brooklyn Decker's finally getting busy, finding the range with the long left jab. Moving with Deeley, squaring her up...AND STAGGERING HER WITH A BIG RIGHT HAND!"
McCarthy: "Set it up with two left jabs and Deeley is HURT."
O'Dell: "Cat is on the move, and Decker is giving chase. Working the left. Looking for the big one."
McCarthy: "Decker not getting hurried. Not forcing anything. Stalking and looking to cut off the ring."
O'Dell: "Cat not having it, though. She's giving ground, circling away, doesn't want to exchange. Decker content to chase, land for points when she squares up, then chase again as Deeley gets out of Dodge."
McCarthy: "You know, 'Gets out of Dodge' is becoming a dated reference, Jenny..."
Tess: "Says the girl who REMEMBERS the PRIMORDIAL banana peel!"
McCarthy: "Shut UP, Walmart!"
O'Dell: "This fight brought to you by Johnnie Walker. And that three-punch flurry brought to Deeley by Brooke Decker. Cat slips away to open ocean, and that's the bell and a clear win for Decker."
McCarthy: "I've got it 48-47 for Deeley, but it may not be that close. The fourth could have gone either way."
O'Dell: "Into the sixth and Decker going right after Deeley, looking to put an end to this thing...and Deeley back on her bicycle, jabbing, circling, moving, Decker not able to locate."
McCarthy: "Playing right into Cat's hands. Coming straight forward trying to load up on something. This didn't work for the first three rounds and it's not working now."
Tess: "Again, this isn't about DEELEY. It's about SWAN. Swan beat Deeley in six. THIS is the sixth."
O'Dell: "Well, CAT thinks it's about Deeley, and, so far, this ROUND has been all about Deeley. She's pecking away for points while Brooklyn tries to find the target, and she's not doing much of it."
McCarthy: "Cat much more active with both the hands and the feet and it's paying off."
O'Dell: "That's the bell, and Deeley's back to a bit of a cushion on the cards..."
Tess: "I've got it 58-56. Four to go."
O'Dell: "Into the seventh now, and Decker back to the jab now. Finding the mark with it. Landing every time Cat stops to punch. Doubling up on it. Suppressing Deeley's fire...AND ROCKING HER WITH A RIGHT HAND! Cat staggered, stumbling backward...Decker banging away, forcing Deeley back to the ropes and thudding leather to the body!"
McCarthy: "Deeley does NOT want to be here."
O'Dell: "But this is PRECISELY where the big blonde wants her. No where to go as Decker gets off lusty. Working the ribs and belly, pounding away at the arms as Cat covers up, SNAPPING the head back with a left, BANGING a right to the side of the head."
Tess: "Decker looking for the finisher..."
O'Dell: "But being patient about it. Not head hunting. Spending plenty of time pounding the body. Good left hook at the bell. Big round for Decker!"
McCarthy: "Still only 10-9, though. Deeley still up at least 67-66, and it could be wider."
O'Dell: "Eighth underway and Decker right back on the attack, moving forward behind the jab, looking to cut the ring off...OHHH! RIGHT HAND DECKER...AND DOWN GOES DEELEY."
Tess: "The term for what Brooklyn just did is 'smote'."
O'Dell: "Deeley rag dolled to her back. Not moving at all. Decker blowing on her right glove as if to blow the smoke off of it. Chased to a neutral corner..."
McCarthy: "Dumb. Costing herself seconds in the count."
Tess: "Not going to matter in this case."
O'Dell: "It does not appear that it will. Eight. Nine. TEN. It's OVER. And the winner by KO8 is 'The 21st Century Goddess', Brooklyn Decker!"
O'Dell: "Let's go to the ring and Tess Valmore..."
Tess: "I've got our winner, Brooklyn Decker, with me, and Brooke, looked like you wanted to end this one early, but she was a little too slick for that..."
Brooklyn(smiling): "Oh, I just wanted some rounds tonight. My PEOPLE wanted me to get some work in. Plus, it's cheating the fans if they only get to see ME for a round or two. When you're the STAR, you owe the paying customers a SHOW. So, I carried her for awhile, but, make no mistake, Tess. I could have taken her out of there any time I wanted. ANY time."
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