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Posted by Traci I speak in tongues from on high, but I do not have POWER from on high! Sometimes I don't pay attention to this and sometimes I can hardly stand it. I don't even feel like I am really a "little Christ" at all. Just because we are used to it, doesn't mean it is OK. When I lay hands on people they don't get healed. What kind of Christianity is this? (Picture here: arms flailing, pacing, saliva spouting, vocal intonations desperate, taking no breaths and all that . . .) I don't think is is supposed to be this way! So, when I ask us all about speaking in tongues, what I am really asking us to think about is "Do we have the thing that tongues is supposed to be the sign of?" (OK, now calming to a gentle tear falling down my cheek) What are we all to do? I don't know, but I know I will never be happy with just speaking in tongues. I want so much more out of this Christian life. I want more than to understand how to study and how to understand the scriptures that have already been written! I want to BE scripture! Acts was just the beginning of the Church age! We aren't supposed to be like what Jesus WAS, but what he IS! In one way, I believe that we "do greater things" in that we lead people to salvation. Jesus could never do this while he was alive the first time. Bringing someone into fellowship with the living God is truly the greatest event in the universe and healing their bodies and calming seas is nothing compared. I used to say that I thought ministering salvation to people was the fulfillment of that promise. I don't believe that anymore - not that it isn't part of it. But now I see that I am still not fully saved. I have not been saved from my sins much more than Abraham. My salvation is still by faith in the sacrifice of a lamb. But all my sins and flesh are still hanging on desperately! And where is the power - the power that says, "if you cannot believe what I say, believe in the works that I do." This is a desperate enigma of the Christian Church today and most especially in America. I have heard amazing stories about missions to other countries; India and Africa and Mexico; people being raised from the dead, blind eyes seeing, lame walking, etc. I don't know why it's not happening in the whole church, I don't know why it is not happening in my life. There are many suppositions and partial answers, but the bottom line is this: The church strikes fear in the hearts of very few. People do not have to believe the words we say and there are hardly any works (that are supernaturally different from a community service organization) for them to look to as an alternative. I cannot help shed tears when I think about this too long. It troubles me deeply. These thoughts have been the foundation of questionings about tongues. No mathmatical, reasonable, greek and hebrew studies, examples or precedents mean much to me if I (and those I hang with) don't really have what tongues is the sign of. Lest you get me wrong - I have deep respect for the study of the Bible and those who have dedicated so much time to it. I love the word of God and understanding much of it is even the foundation for my anguish on this subject. Blessing to all of you! Traci
on 5/6/2006, 12:02 pm
24.16.245.241
Most of the questions I have asked and comments I have made on this subject have come from one of the deepest anguishes of my Christian life:
When I pray for people, their problems aren't solved.
When I rebuke demons they don't leave.
I can't even overcome some of the simplest of self-control issues.
I don't have wisdom in difficult circumstances.
I do not have the boldness that comes from God - only that which comes from me or my anger.
I have never had a vision (part of what Peter said about "This is that which was spoken of . . .")
I have never been slain in the spirit (by the way, is this scriptural? - said tongue in cheek!)
I have never been responsible for a miracle.
I have never been involved in a "greater things . . " moment.
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