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Posted by lms on 1/12/2006, 9:21 am My driver is fear of abandonment. I am a major caretaker, and move away from my core in relationships. I have raionalized it as well I am having so much fun doing this new things I now like, etc. They are not harmful I am expanding. So, just a bit of background. I want to get your advice on if I sound for sure like a codep? My S/O is commitment phobic (laced with excuses), and drinks to much for my likes. All recnt realizations since my friend told me I sound codep. This is a pattern for me. I rarely get into serious relationships because I am afraid I make bad choices. I never go out with anyone longer than 1-3 months. Current S/o is 8 mo. of loads of time spent together as I thought he was the one. How do I recognize a healthy one? I think no drinking issues, first. Is there any hope of talking to my current boyfriend about this?
Hello, 1st time here so I will try to make this brief. Through a friend and subsequent research I have learned I am co-dep.
Do most codeps end up with codeps as partners?
Book suggestions on an action plan to heal oneself?
Suggestions: on a daily plan to help oneself move out of a relationship with another codep.
through reading the posts (invaluable) I actually can see that my caretaking gives me the attention and love I need. I only feel validated that way. If I am not doing it, I feel empty. On my own I am great and in tune with myself, taking care of myself and my daughter. I do have to drink to really let go and have fun, I have since quit as I realized this was not healthy. I would end up being intimate with someone I barely knew. It happened like 2-3/yr. Not good.
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