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Posted by Pinki on 2/4/2006, 2:13 pm, in reply to "Advice?" Yes, to my mind this is cart before horse stuff insofar as the ability of time to heal the strange pschology of co-dep goes. My advice is to have a little faith. One pattern is to try live other people's lives for them. to have a vision of a future that absolutely must just has to gotto gotto gotto manifest. Got to cut out the obsession. Live now. Not in the past, not in the future. Your actions now shape your future. Take the time to heal and create a healthy reality for yourself. A silly trick I applied: put an ordinary elastic band around your wrist. Negative thought: snap. Obsession thought: snap. This doesnt mean you dont think of this/these situation/s at all. For me it was a reminder not to dwell, to change the way i thought about things - its was a commitment to take action to grow past this thing that warps our belief in ourselves. Causing pain: forgive yourself. Make it up to those can. Believe in youself afresh. Let harmony prevail? Grin. Hope some of this helps. P
Dear Harmony, 
Im about six months into this and it gets easier although I'm still second guessing my reactions.
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