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Posted by Beth on 7/6/2006, 3:30 pm
I have been married now for 10 years (second marriage, first husband alcoholic) to a man that was recovering from Crack and during the first 6 years of our life it was hard to say the least. My question is who is co dependent? Me? because I couldn't trust him when he wasn't around because I thought he would take off and do drugs or him the one that calls me every 5 minutes I am out of his site to see what I am doing and when I am coming home. He has done so much to me over the last 10 years and those memories don't go away they manifest and I am ready to walk but don't want to hurt him?? Am I crazy? Not all our time was bad obviously. We recently started going to church and we do EVERYTHING together opposed to my first husband who I never did anything with and perhaps that is why it was easier to leave him because I felt independent already? How do I separate his feelings from mine. How do I care about myself and not think about his feelings? Why can't I do what I want and leave. When I talk about leaving he says things like , remember the day we got married? blah, blah, blah...and then he sees an older couple and says look that is me and you one day. Is this love or manipulation? I feel manipulated and brainwashed....
Can some one help me understand ?
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