Posted by Born2Smoke4Ever on 10/20/2009, 8:17 pm
76.244.163.0
Before I begin this sordid tale that sounds rather "white trashy", I must explain that I am the polar opposite. I am a 38 year old, Chinese-Filipino woman, and I am highly educated. (Dentist). I stand 5'4", and have fair skin and a thin figure. My reason for posting: I have a smoking fetish that no other could rival.
I smoke a pack and a half of Capri 120's per day. This may not sound too impressive, but consider that I am a total closet smoker. The only 2 people in the world that know I smoke are my husband, and my daughter. I do not dare smoke outside my home for fear of being discovered by a patient. When I get home from my clinic after a long day, I make up for lost time however. I chain smoke from the moment I hit the door until the minute my head hits my pillow. Basically, I can't get enough smoke into my lungs to keep me satisfied- I love smoking in a way that is difficult to describe. Also, I am not attracted to men that do not smoke. By a strange stroke of luck, my husband shares my fetish, a fact we did not know about each other until we were married for 3 years. He loves watching me smoke, and encourages me to smoke as much as possible.
Enough about me, here is where my confession gets really sordid. I have always wanted my daughter to smoke. Ever since she was very young, I always imagined how wonderful it would be to introduce her to this habit which gives me so much joy. The only problem, my husband does not share my enthusiasm for letting our daughter smoke. I asked him hypothetically one time a few years ago if we should let Mackenzie smoke if she shows an interest. He replied, "sure, when she turns 18". I laughed it off, but secretly I was disappointed.
A little bit about my husband, he is an officer in the military, and he is unfortunately deployed right now until February. If he knew our daughter was smoking, he would kill her. And me. Anyways, a couple of months ago, I was helping Mackenzie do her homework, and as usual, I was smoking. At one point, I got up to grab a glass of water, and when I looked back at her, she was holding my cigarette and pretending to take puffs. "Look mommy, I'm going to smoke your cigarette!" I hesitated for a quick second, and said "Go for it". "Really, she replied". Yup, but be careful, you don't want to make yourself sick, I said. Awkwardly, she brought the Capri 120 to her mouth and took her first drag, which she immediately blew the smoke out. The look on her face said she was not thrilled about the taste. "Yuck", she exclaimed. "It doesn't taste like it smells". I explained that it takes awhile to get used to the taste, but when you do, they taste really good. Satisfied with that answer, she took another quick drag and quickly blew the smoke back out. She repeated this until she was down to the filter, at which time I asked, "how was your first cigarette?. "Weird", she said. "Why do you and daddy smoke, anyway?" I lit a fresh Capri and explained that it gives mommy and daddy pleasure. After that, she did not bring it up again, and after finishing her homework, went to bed as usual.
The next night at homework time, everything was the same as before, except I noticed that every time I took a drag, she was watching me. After 45 minutes of study, she finally asked "Mommy, can I have another cigarette?" Trying to hide my satisfaction with her question, I said "okay, but if I give you one, you have to smoke correctly". She asked what I meant, and I said "look how I smoke". "When I puff, I breathe the smoke inside me; that is the correct way to smoke". She said she understood, and took a fresh Capri from the pack at lit it. I demonstrated, "okay, take a small puff, and then take a deep breath". She did, and smiled when she noticed a small amount of smoke escaped her lips when she exhaled. "Cool!", she exclaimed. I said, "take it slow, otherwise you will get sick". Every few seconds, she took a drag and inhaled it deep inside her 9 year old lungs. To my amazement, she did not cough once. When she finished, she said she felt dizzy. I explained that her body was not used to the smoke, but after smoking for awhile, it makes you feel really good. "Thanks, mommy", she said as she got up and headed to her bedroom. I sat there thinking for a moment at the table; what have I started? I can stop her now, but I don't want to. My god, Dan is going to kill me when he get back to find his 9 year old princess smoking. Undeterred, I vowed that I would not deprive Mac of the pleasure of smoking, even if she is so young. I still had 4 months at that time to come up with a way to explain to Dan and make him understand. As I lit another Capri, I committed myself right then and there to teaching Mac the joys of smoking.
More to come....let me know what you think.
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