Friends Supporting Friends
[ Friends Supporting Friends ]
The easiest way to avoid regrets is to ask yourself this question, "If not now, when?" It's a powerful way to put life and our decisions about how we spend our time into perspective"
Sunday Grats - what are YOU blessed with today? nt
Posted by Krista on 1/6/2019, 8:47 am
Posted by Delta on 1/6/2019, 4:30 pm, in reply to "Sunday Grats - what are YOU blessed with today? nt"
My grandson is okay. There was an altercation between customers at his work and he witnessed one person shoot one of the others. Luckily the man ran instead of shooting other people. The world has gone crazy. I hope that counseling can help him. |
The tile setter is back from his vacation. I should get my bathroom back by next Monday. Yay!
Decaf coffee and lots of it. Even though the temps were warmer outside yesterday and the house is always the same temperature I was cold all day yesterday and so far today.
Planning a trip to visit family. I didn't get to see hardly anyone the last time I was there because everyone had gotten sick. Hopefully, this trip will be better.
My hairdresser. When my wonderful hairdresser of many years retired several years ago I went through a lot of them but was never as happy as I had been. Recently I started using a girl that I used to teach in Sunday School. I always thought that she was the sweetest thing. She still is and I swear that she uses a magic wand instead of scissors and dye brushes. I have been so happy with my hair lately.
Posted by Beverly` on 1/6/2019, 1:52 pm, in reply to "Sunday Grats - what are YOU blessed with today? nt"
- I slept better last night. My sleep has been totally disrupted these past months. I've had a few great bouts of sleep. It's better when I eat foods that don't upset my stomach. |
- I brought home some of mom's favorite things to give away to friends. I am giving them to her friends. It feels good.
-Murr and I went to the nursing home and got her things yesterday.
- my mom kept talking about taking care of unfinished business. There are a few things I will address. She's probably right.
- I love to watch football - it seems like many months since Murray & I have had the luxury of hanging leisurely about.
friends, family, you all, fb, internet, cell, car
Posted by Sue on 1/6/2019, 11:19 am, in reply to "Sunday Grats - what are YOU blessed with today? nt"
It's Sunday......there'll be football all day. |
Going to Von's to shop and browse. I love looking at the new food items that are always coming in.
Rain....lots of rain. It started raining yesterday afternoon and is still coming down. Vegas is a desert....rain is always welcomed.
This first cup of coffee is extra good this morning. I have a bit of a sore throat, and the heat is feeling mighty fine.
So grateful that Paula is willing to share her true emotions with us.....it's hard being that openly honest.
Posted by Paula on 1/6/2019, 10:05 am, in reply to "Sunday Grats - what are YOU blessed with today? nt"
Making a list of things to do to try to help pull me out of this horrible depression....little things like I pulled my vacuum cleaner out of my bedroom and put it in the kitchen. I haven't used it since the end of October! One step that seems overwhelming is just pulling it out...feeling like I can't even do that makes the likelihood of using it almost nil. Set my pill boxes up. Haven't been taking my meds more than half the time...seemed too hard to set them up. Brought in one of my Christmas flags. I haven't had a siege like this in a long while. Every little thing feels too hard. I've set out to do a very manageable amount of stuff today...unfortunately it's the same manageable amount of stuff I've laid out for weeks now. I have to shake myself out of this...taking the meds will probably help and getting some kind of nutritious food in me will as well. Yesterday I ate pancakes, milk, a little fake pork pocket, a huge bowl of buttered popcorn and a bag of candy. That's typical of how I've been eating for weeks. I've also been drinking way too much at night. This is new. I've never, ever been someone who sat at home and drank at night. That's been going on for a couple of months. Alcohol is a depressant. No more watching the news...or a huge decrease in the amount of time I do watch it or check it out on my phone. |
I need to get outside. I need to listen to more Mozart, Vivaldi, Puccini....I need to get a spiritual mentor. Living without the belief that there is any Higher Power who intervenes directly in my life is hard. Prayer just seems sort of stupid. I mean why should I have to beg and beg and plead to get a benevolent father to help me or those I love? He's either going to do it or he's not. I don't think I can twist an omnipotent God's arm! I know who I need to talk to but I also know it's going to involve a lot of crying and that's not a promising idea.
So I am grateful that I can post all of this here.
Posted by Cindyh on 1/7/2019, 5:51 am, in reply to "Mine"
I'm so sorry you are going through all this. I hope things get better for you soon|
Oh, Paula, that is
Posted by Delta on 1/6/2019, 4:03 pm, in reply to "Mine"
a lot to be carrying by yourself. I am glad that you finally felt safe enough to share it with us. Know that we love you and care about this. Acknowledging is a big step. Everything you did today is a big step. I am so proud of you. |
I totally understand the vacuum cleaner thing. Why is it that it is so difficult to get that sucker (pun intended) out of the closet at times? I have those problems too sometimes and I am obsessive about keeping a clean house most of the time, though you wouldn't believe it if you walked in right now. There are just times that I feel paralyzed and getting to the closet, let alone getting it out and using it feels monumental. There are times it has sat in a prominent location for a few days taunting me before I worked up the fight to use it.
You already know what you need to do. Please find ways to do it even if it is not the way you want to do it right now. Go through a window if that door is closed. Even the crying. Crying is therapeutic and you of all of us know that. Whatever is on the other side of the crying is never as horrible and big as if feels like it will be. What we fear is rarely ever there at all, just in our fear of it that keeps growing until we deal with it. Reach out and try to include more friends in your daily life. I can see home health becoming very limiting if you allow it. Know we are here. E-mail or call someone on here that you feel connected with. Don't continue to carry this burden alone.
Posted by Beverly on 1/6/2019, 1:45 pm, in reply to "Mine"
what you are going thru. So glad you are speaking up. |
Yes.. prepare your meds in those clippy plastic week containers. It could help to have it more regulated. If you think it would help - talk to your doctor and change meds. But only after having been on your now meds regularly.
Can you get at least a couple times a week in the pool. I know it is helpful to me. Even just walkig around or gentle exercies.
Oh - the food. I am no expert, of course. Make the things you like to eat inn the litest version possible. Sometimes if I change up my food plan - it feels good to to something a little different. Pack your lunch.
I love your idea of going out with those singers - good for your inner self. Walking with these playing.
I wish my magic wand was working...
We all love you so much. Talk as much as you need.
Yes... love you sweetie.
Posted by Cindy on 1/6/2019, 12:03 pm, in reply to "Mine"
I am so glad you are on here sharing your feelings with us. Making a list and working off of it is a great idea! I think the most important thing is getting back on your meds. Make that a priority and I am betting that things will start to look better. |
For today, get your meds set up for the week and start taking taking them! Be as kind to yourself as you would a client coming to see you. If they said they were off their meds for the most part and felt like you do, what would you say to them?
Put on some music you love that speaks to your soul. Pull out your vacation photos and start to dream about your next trip. Have you traveled much in the U.S. or Canada? You have such fabulous trips overseas, I just wondered if you have seen a lot of the United States or surrounding countries? Maybe plan some short weekend trips to nearby places? There are several 3 day weekends in the year, maybe start planning some little mini trips to help renew your spirit throughout the year?
And remember...donít sweat the small stuff, and in the end, itís ALL small stuff! Take care of you! The rest will fall into place! Surround yourself with fur babies, family and friends and know that everything will work out! You are stronger than you think and we are all behind you 100% and cheering you on!
(( Paula ))
Posted by Krista on 1/6/2019, 11:25 am, in reply to "Mine"
Acknowledging and naming "it" are big first steps. I'm far from the top of "my game" either. I'm glad you are sharing how you feel with us. Tackle what you can .. take a breath and when you're ready, take one more step. |
I'm here for ya ...
Posted by Sue on 1/6/2019, 11:09 am, in reply to "Mine"
I so wish I could hold you in my lap in a rocker until the pain subsides. You need comforting, and I don't know how to do that with words....only actions. Wrapping you in a warm, gentle embrace....and hoping life will improve for you.....I want YOUR sun to shine once more! I was hoping the prospect of this new job would do the trick....|
Posted by Paula on 1/6/2019, 10:08 am, in reply to "Mine"
This is not me whining...this is what depression feels like. It's not necessarily circumstantial though circumstances (like my awful job) can contribute. I will, however, try to reframe all the negative things I am saying about myself in my head and there is a long, immobilizing list.|
You are amazing
Posted by Lianne on 1/6/2019, 6:12 pm, in reply to "BTW"
You are so insightful that I swear you can diagnose and heal yourself. |
We spend so much time at our jobs that in my opinion it is very important that we are not miserable there.
I am thinking the job change can be a start for you.
Though I don't hate living alone I think my mental health was better when I had my husband to bounce ideas off of. I liked his help in making decisions and also to share our moods (he lift me I lift him).
If something went wrong I couldn't wait to discuss it with him. In other words I think when we are born we should be given a ss# and a therapist.
I wish I had words that would help and I am glad you talk to us here.
I think you are a wonderful woman.
You are very insightful
Posted by Delta on 1/6/2019, 7:00 pm, in reply to "You are amazing"
when you say that you think your mental health was better when you had your husband to bounce ideas off of. I noticed that as my friend base became smaller and smaller from friends and family (not the toxic ones) moved or passed away that my sugar/carb intake became more increased. I thought it was just depression but I recently read in a medical journal (I love that our hospital has a medical library open to anyone that wants to use it and it is conveniently located to the waiting area for people accompanying those having testing done) that researchers concur with that. |
It seems that people in general worldwide scored the highest on happiness in their lives when they are surrounded by people that they connect with. They found that those who don't have that in their lives try to substitute happiness with pleasure and the top things were drugs, alcohol and sweets/carbs. The US was literally the worlds worst for happiness scores and the highest for chasing pleasure instead. It seems that so many people are getting so involved with jobs, chasing things and using social media (all their terms) instead of making real connections with people that we lead the world in depression and pleasure addictions.
I hope that you are able to build some close connections that you can bounce ideas and decisions off of. It seems a necessity.
thank you, Delta : )
Posted by Lianne on 1/7/2019, 5:30 pm, in reply to "You are very insightful"
though there are some things I would prefer to discuss with my husband obviously I do talk but he does not answer. |
Much like raising a child I find to get through all of this it takes a village.
I am VERY lucky.. I have my daughter .I have two sisters I adore, 3 good friends. and amazingly helpful neighbors.
it has been nearly a year and 4 months since Rich passed and all of these people still make themselves available to me and help me with any problems/issues that pop up from day to day.
There is just nothing like knowing there is someone to go home to that will always be in your corner.
That said I appreciate all of the people I have.
Do you take meds for the depression?
Posted by Sue on 1/6/2019, 11:12 am, in reply to "BTW"
If so, do they help? While dealing with BC, I tried several different meds for anxiety/depression. They all made me feel worse. What I think helped most was getting outside every day and taking a brief walk. For me, it's ideal therapy!|
Cinq Choses Pour Moi
Posted by Krista on 1/6/2019, 8:50 am, in reply to "Sunday Grats - what are YOU blessed with today? nt"
1) a husband who cooks and cleans. I'm pretty well out of commission with the shoulder pain so it sure makes me appreciate all that he does even more. |
2) working at the gym today but since it is a busy time there are 2 of us working the desk today. That will make the time go faster for sure! I'll have someone with me 'til 4 this afternoon instead of being alone 'til 8
3) 2 more weeks at the radio station. Loving every minute of that!
4) Ray's working with our friends this weekend and should receive his first unemployment cheque this week
5) customers and co-workers from Mazda expressing how sad they are that Ray isn't there anymore. A lot of customers went there because of him. He's well respected and liked there
[ Friends Supporting Friends ]