Otherstream Message Board: Re: Leaving San Francisco

Re: Leaving San Francisco

Posted by murderingmouth on 5/8/2005, 8:14 pm, in reply to "Re: Leaving San Francisco"
68.120.157.152

: I think I've always suggested that
: if you don't love it, then leave
: it (for your own happiness).
:
: Yes, there is nothing negative
: about "love it or leave
: it." In fact, it looks from
: the statistics, and my anecdotal
: experience, that if couples find
: they don't love each other any
: more, they will surely find
: leaving each other a real relief.
Whilst what you say does, in fact, match our actions, I think what David meant by his portrayal of the "love it or leave it" philosophy is that it's intellectually lazy. Whether you're talking about a dysfunctional bit of geography or a marriage or a movie, you have more than the choice of loving it and leaving it - there's the possibility of tolerating it or endeavoring to improve it.
If I cared all that much anymore about the type of city I lived in or where it was, I would have the energy and inspiration to try to make SF more livable for myself. If David and I are getting upset with each other, we engage in mutual psychoanalysis rather than break up. If a movie is boring, I get more popcorn and maybe start people watching or passing notes to the people I'm with in the theatre.
From Sister Betty: "Yet, sometimes we fool ourselves thinking the next place will be sparkly-shiney. Pretty much nowhere is sparkly-shiney. Every place is just somewhere else."
That sums up my feelings of late. Don't get me wrong, I still have my little obsessions, like Seattle and Pittsburgh and Canada, places that I just know can do no wrong - but that obsession would wear off as soon as I chose to live there. It's no longer exactly about "where" for me as it is "how". I'm choosing to go somewhere that will allow me a wider range of "hows".
I doubt many people arrive at their dream city and spend years so happy they're having a never-ending orgasm (unless you come to SF and do nothing but go to sex clubs). People have their dream lifestyles and life is about building that dream. You never achieve it, because it's a dream. It's the process of building it that one has to look forward to.
And perhaps the opportunity to rant and rave about the people who are in your way and pissing you off about the smallest things as you go. Yeah, that's what life's all about...
MM

Link: Always you, my darling... At the center.

Message Thread:

Leaving San Francisco - Bill S 4/29/2005, 6:09 pm
- Re: Leaving San Francisco - robW 5/6/2005, 2:47 pm
  - Re: Leaving San Francisco - murderingmouth 5/8/2005, 8:14 pm
    - Re: Leaving San Francisco - J.L. 5/22/2005, 11:41 pm
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--Previous Message-- : I think I've always suggested that : if you don't love it, then leave : it (for your own happiness). : : Yes, there is nothing negative : about "love it or leave : it." In fact, it looks from : the statistics, and my anecdotal : experience, that if couples find : they don't love each other any : more, they will surely find : leaving each other a real relief. : : Whilst what you say does, in fact, : match our actions, I think what : David meant by his portrayal of : the "love it or leave : it" philosophy is that it's : intellectually lazy. Whether : you're talking about a : dysfunctional bit of geography or : a marriage or a movie, you have : more than the choice of loving it : and leaving it - there's the : possibility of tolerating it or : endeavoring to improve it. : : If I cared all that much anymore : about the type of city I lived in : or where it was, I would have the : energy and inspiration to try to : make SF more livable for myself. : If David and I are getting upset : with each other, we engage in : mutual psychoanalysis rather than : break up. If a movie is boring, I : get more popcorn and maybe start : people watching or passing notes : to the people I'm with in the : theatre. : : From Sister Betty: "Yet, : sometimes we fool ourselves : thinking the next place will be : sparkly-shiney. Pretty much : nowhere is sparkly-shiney. Every : place is just somewhere : else." : : That sums up my feelings of late. : Don't get me wrong, I still have : my little obsessions, like Seattle : and Pittsburgh and Canada, places : that I just know can do no wrong - : but that obsession would wear off : as soon as I chose to live there. : It's no longer exactly about : "where" for me as it is : "how". I'm choosing to : go somewhere that will allow me a : wider range of "hows". : : I doubt many people arrive at : their dream city and spend years : so happy they're having a : never-ending orgasm (unless you : come to SF and do nothing but go : to sex clubs). People have their : dream lifestyles and life is about : building that dream. You never : achieve it, because it's a dream. : It's the process of building it : that one has to look forward to. : : And perhaps the opportunity to : rant and rave about the people who : are in your way and pissing you : off about the smallest things as : you go. Yeah, that's what life's : all about... : : MM :

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