Posted by Dave
on 8/26/2011, 7:03 am, in reply to "Friend wants to smoke, what should I do?"
72.207.219.180
Unless you are thinking about quitting, please take the opportunity and smoke with your friend as you normally do. Not everyone who inhales coughs, even on their first try--I didn't and I'm not the only one. I say "please" not because I have any ulterior motive, but because if you find it "really tempting" you owe it to yourself to finally let go of some of that tension/stress/desire and this is a good chance to open the valve and release some of the pressure.
Putting too much effort into pretending to be a newbie is not a good idea though--if you relax even a little, pretending will quickly backfire and become a chore in and of itself. I smoke obviously, and am pro-smokers' rights, but I'd never try to start anyone or even encourage them to smoke more, as that's a decision that deserves to be made independently. But I feel for (often angry for) closeted smokers who'd like to crack the door and peek out once in a while.
After all, it's only smoking a cigarette--you're not snorting cocaine, cheating on a spouse, or shoplifting. Lots and LOTS of adults smoke a cigarette once in a while, and whether staying closeted benefits you or not, or even if you like the feeling of sneaking around, feeling tense and guilty about it and/or sitting around focused on how you'd like to do something that is 100% legal and acceptable for an adult with freedom of will rather than on enjoying life and the company of your friend, is not only not fair to yourself, but is probably far more harmful in the long run than just smoking a cigarette and enjoying it now and again. And besides, what would your friend say if you accepted the offer and then appeared to take to it--"Man, I wanted you to smoke with me, but I didn't want you to really smoke or enjoy it"??
Dave
--Previous Message--
: I have a friend who I have known for YEARS who
: likes to smoke from time to time. Lots of
: times when he smokes, he tries to get me to
: smoke with him. But over the years, I have
: always been too embarrassed to do so. I've
: always told him that I just don't want to
: smoke. He asked me again today. And,
: although I have not smoked for about a week,
: it sounded REALLY tempting after my stint of
: increased smoking for the last month.
:
: But I have two problems. First and most
: obviously, there is the whole problem of
: smoking around a friend. But secondly, when
: he DOES smoke, he (1) tends not to inhale,
: and (2) goes into a coughing fit if he
: tries. So what's he going to think if I sit
: there and inhale like it's not a big deal?
: THAT'S something I hate to think about. So
: do you think I should just pass on this?
: Should I pretend to cough? Or should I just
: take the opportunity and smoke normally?
:
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