Re: Friend wants to smoke, what should I do?
Posted by Dave on 8/26/2011, 7:16 pm, in reply to "Re: Friend wants to smoke, what should I do?"
Please forgive me if I sounded patronizing; I certainly didn't mean to give the impression that I think you're less than intelligent. It would be far more accurate to say that written language conveys far less than spoken words, and sometimes I simply assume ignorance when I should not. |
Personally, the only illicit drug I ever tried was marijuana--and then not until the age of 28. I found it very useful in that allowed me to turn off the constant analyzing my brain performs, unbidden, of my own actions and of those I interact with. Unfortunately, it also left me lazy and listless for days afterward, so my experimentation with it was short-lived. I didn't have a problem with telling folks about my marijuana use either, and practically everyone I know knew about that long before any of them found out that I am a cigarette smoker. I agree it's funny how that works; perhaps it speaks to the sheer amount of shame and guilt attached to using tobacco, or maybe it's simply because the use of illicit substaces takes place in far fewer spaces, providing less incentive for vitriolic rhetoric. It's an interesting question to consider.
Finally, though I've never had the opportunity to try cocaine, I probably would not because I'm fairly certain I'd like it too much. I'd actually like to try certain psychedelics in a controlled environment for spiritual/psychological purposes, but those are even more difficult to come by. The only drugs I'm truly scared of are hard opiates like heroin. I know people who've used such drugs casually, but far too many others have said that after trying hard opiates once, they knew they'd spend the rest of their lives wanting more, or not being able to care about anything else quite as much as how good it felt to be free of all pain, fear, guilt, and worry for as long as the high lasted. Perhaps it's because I have intimate knowledge of what addiction to cigarettes feels like, but the thought of feeling that way about a drug so powerful, expensive, difficult to obtain, and variable in purity freaks me out enough that I wouldn't dare touch the stuff.
: I, of course, know that not everybody coughs
: when they first inhale. I myself was one of
: those people who was able to inhale without
: coughing. And quite frankly, that has always
: bothered me somewhat. As for my friend, I
: know that he WILL cough because he always
: Funny that you mention using cocaine. I have
: to admit that I had my drug days. But the
: funny thing is that I was always MUCH less
: ashamed of taking drugs than smoking. Let's
: just say that I have told most people I know
: about the drugs. But smoking? Well, that's
: another story.
: --Previous Message--
: Unless you are thinking about quitting,
: please take the opportunity and smoke with
: your friend as you normally do. Not everyone
: who inhales coughs, even on their first
: try--I didn't and I'm not the only one. I
: say "please" not because I have
: any ulterior motive, but because if you find
: it "really tempting" you owe it to
: yourself to finally let go of some of that
: tension/stress/desire and this is a good
: chance to open the valve and release some of
: the pressure.
: Putting too much effort into pretending to
: be a newbie is not a good idea though--if
: you relax even a little, pretending will
: quickly backfire and become a chore in and
: of itself. I smoke obviously, and am
: pro-smokers' rights, but I'd never try to
: start anyone or even encourage them to smoke
: more, as that's a decision that deserves to
: be made independently. But I feel for (often
: angry for) closeted smokers who'd like to
: crack the door and peek out once in a while.
: After all, it's only smoking a
: cigarette--you're not snorting cocaine,
: cheating on a spouse, or shoplifting. Lots
: and LOTS of adults smoke a cigarette once in
: a while, and whether staying closeted
: benefits you or not, or even if you like the
: feeling of sneaking around, feeling tense
: and guilty about it and/or sitting around
: focused on how you'd like to do something
: that is 100% legal and acceptable for an
: adult with freedom of will rather than on
: enjoying life and the company of your
: friend, is not only not fair to yourself,
: but is probably far more harmful in the long
: run than just smoking a cigarette and
: enjoying it now and again. And besides, what
: would your friend say if you accepted the
: offer and then appeared to take to
: it--"Man, I wanted you to smoke with
: me, but I didn't want you to really smoke
: or enjoy it"??
: --Previous Message--
: I have a friend who I have known for YEARS
: likes to smoke from time to time. Lots of
: times when he smokes, he tries to get me to
: smoke with him. But over the years, I have
: always been too embarrassed to do so. I've
: always told him that I just don't want to
: smoke. He asked me again today. And,
: although I have not smoked for about a week,
: it sounded REALLY tempting after my stint of
: increased smoking for the last month.
: But I have two problems. First and most
: obviously, there is the whole problem of
: smoking around a friend. But secondly, when
: he DOES smoke, he (1) tends not to inhale,
: and (2) goes into a coughing fit if he
: tries. So what's he going to think if I sit
: there and inhale like it's not a big deal?
: THAT'S something I hate to think about. So
: do you think I should just pass on this?
: Should I pretend to cough? Or should I just
: take the opportunity and smoke normally?