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I'm sorry to disappoint you, Robert, but there are few things in this life over which a consensus exists. I wouldn't expect two mathematicians to give two different answers to a mathematical problem, because mathematics is not an opinion, but most other things are. Do we expect political commentators to reach a consensus so we know definitively who to vote for? If you go to three doctors, you may get three diagnoses or, even if the diagnoses are the same, three recommended treatments. Music criticism always has been like this. In my younger days I avidly read Gramophone, Records and Recording and the EMG Monthly Letter and noted how a recording lauded in one would likely be trashed in one of the others (EMG in trashing mood could be devastating). The disarming feature of MWI is that you might get the contrasting views under one roof, which is just as wel since only one of the three magazines mentioned remains (and is a shadow of its old self).
Wolfgang Sawallisch once related how, after his first piano recital (he was originally a pianist), he turned eagerly to the papers. The first said he was very musical but had a poor technique. The second said he had a fine technique but was completely unmusical. After that, he never read a review again. And what about Neville Cardus who, after his first experience of Don Giovanni in a provincial theatre, walked the streets in a daze, so overwhelmed was he. Only to read Edward Dent's comment in the morning paper: "Rather than have a Don Giovanni like this, better have no Don Giovanni at all".
Music criticism just is like this. You read the opposite views and then, if the repertoire or interpreters interest you, you buy the disc anyway, or find a way to hear it. Reviewers can tell us a few objective facts like, are all repeats taken, has the score been altered in any way (older performances of Beethoven usually were), are there cuts (older performances of Traviata are unlikely to be complete), are original or modern instruments used, but as to the deeper issue of what the music or the performance communicates, this is all opinion.
As to this "unfathomable" review, it looks clear enough to me, if this is unfathomable, I should have thought most reviews here (including probably all of mine) would fail Szoze's fathomability test.