I am pretty depressed and sat playing spider solitaire for most of my 4 days off. Talked to my shrink yesterday (regular 6 month check-in). I just didn't feel like getting cleaned up to go see her so I requested a phone call and she obliged. Told her what was going on and that I can't seem to motivate myself to do anything. She talked about a med change but I told her this is depression with a cause so I think I need to just work through the sense of loss and dread I have regarding what's going on with my niece. That's different than these depressive episodes that just come out of the blue.She told me to check back in after a month, sooner if nothing gets better.
Carin and I are texting but I'm not asking her anything about what's going on with the pig she is married to and she isn't saying anything either. I got the sense that some of you were shocked when I said I wouldn't spend Christmas with them. I can't tell you how sick I feel when I think about her and the boys being with a convicted pedophile who has so mistreated her. I cannot support that relationship but don't want to lose her completely. Maybe he'll have provisions when he's released that he can't be around minor children. Physically and emotionally, I can't be a part of it. Shrink agreed and said it was ok to take care of myself and have some healthier boundaries.
I have to go to work today so will get myself together and go. Thinking about other people's problems will help!
Added a week in London to my trip so, if all goes well, I'll be in London from Dec 12th through the 18th and Paris from the 18th through the 26th.
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