differently lately. I am trying to get away from heavily processed foods.

I have been choosing what I call naked meats, fruits, vegetables and grains. Instead of using cookbooks to try to make everything lower fat like on WW I have gone back to simple meals. I have been doing a lot of sheet pan meals in the oven and stir fries, things like that. Although salads do not agree with my digestive system I have been trying to have more of them at home because my husband likes them.

I have cut a lot of sugar out of my diet in sweets as well as products that contain sugar for seemingly no reason but to get us addicted.

I try to make sure that the first meal of the day contains about 25 to 30 g of protein.

Although you don't want to hear this, I have added some red meat to my diet as well as iron-rich vegetables and beans because my iron was getting low and most senior citizens don't have low iron so it is not in our vitamins, and the pills mess with my system. I personally don't care for red meat from feed lots that we generally get from stores and most butchers these days, so it is big for me. Although I don't enjoy eating it, just think of it like taking meds, it is making me feel more satisfied and I don't want to snack on the days I have it. I am sleeping better most nights since adding it as well as losing better so I must have needed it badly.

I am sure that getting more sleep helps as well.

I was taken off a medication that made me gain 12 pounds when I started on it and no matter how little I ate I was struggling to lose it.

I usually eat my first meal between 12-2 and again between 6-8, so about a 16/8 hour fast/eat window. Most of the time, I don't eat between meals. If I have to get up a couple hours earlier than usual for trips or something I might eat earlier, like 10 or so and have a light snack later like a tablespoon of hummus and celery or baby carrots, a tablespoon of peanut butter melted and drizzled over apple wedges, cottage cheese and a pear or celery, or something similar.

I try to eat from a formula of a very old exchange diet of 6-8 oz of meat or other protein per day, 2 starches, 2 fats, 2 dairy, 2 fruits and unlimited non starchy vegetables or to make it even simpler a plate system--1/4 protein, 1/4 starch, 1/2 non-starchy vegetables and fruit and a bottle cap size of oil or a "good" fat serving. It just makes it simple for me and gives me between 1200 and 1500 calories if I stick to it without counting.

I am not following a diet, I am just trying to stop eating like an unsupervised twelve-year-old and be a little more mindful when it comes to eating. Taking the stress out helps stop the food noise for me. When I am on a "diet" all I can think about is food and what I am going to eat next, when I am going to eat next, oops, I had that when I shouldn't so now it is a free-for-all the rest of the day, etc. I have given up all or nothing thinking for simplicity. If I want something special, I plan to have it in moderation (we only taste the first three bites, and after that, we are like an alcoholic drinking the rest of the night chasing that buzz that has come and gone), planned out, and no more than one treat a week.

It is just all things that I can live with to get off the diet merry-go-round. Nothing special, nothing that boxes me in and makes me crazy, no punishments for being "bad", and no all-or-nothing overthinking. No more giving up because I went over a little bit today, or fasting the next three days because of it either. Will it work for the long run? Who knows, but that is where I am now, and I am comfortable there for the moment.

I know that you want to get to your goal for surgery, and you are doing an amazing job of it, but afterwards, you will have a lot of time to think for a couple of weeks. Sit down with yourself and decide what is comfortable for you. Ditch the all-or-nothing mindset and the unsupervised twelve-year-old in you and find food peace. Stop listening to the food and listen to your body. Imagine being in Paris and not having to scope out chairs for their sturdiness, not having to worry about small beds or shower doors, not having to worry about plane and train seats. Imagine the freedom of not only not having to do what food is telling you all the time, but all the things that you haven't done for years, without putting a lot of thought and effort into making sure that you "fit". I think you are worth that freedom and all the beauty that comes with it.

You can do this. It's simple, not easy.