and weak. If that is the situation, the hospital has no business sending him home. People who are too weak to go to the bathroom at a hospital can't be expected to take care of themselves at home just because they have run out of time there as determined by insurance companies. If he is still so weak that he has a catheter, he needs to be in a skilled nursing facility or he needs home care. You are not qualified for the job and should not feel guilty for not taking it on. You absolutely have to think of Ken in this, too.