It hit me! I've been manic. I didn’t put it all together until I told her everything. It makes perfect sense. She has Bipolar Disorder so she recognized what I was saying. How could I not have put it all together? It hit me when I was talking about the enormous amounts of food.I was eating and it was never enough physically or emotionally. I've never experienced that before, not in this exact way.
In my business, if you have even one manic episode, you are labeled BiPolar and that diagnosis follows you forever. I don't believe in that. Over 30 years, I've now had 3 episodes and one was medication induced. I'm not on meds for Bipolar because I'm not. It's a very sensitive subject that so many clients have to deal with. Once diagnosed, any time they have big feelings, people start getting nervous, "are you taking your meds?" They are stripped of the natural experience of having strong emotions from time to time. With clients I've seen for a long time over the years, I've come to be able to help them figure out if a manic episode is occurring or they're just upset. I recognize what's going on with them by their presentation.
So, please don't lay a diagnosis on me. Now that Carin and I have talked it through, I know what it is and what I have to do. No shopping, eat healthy with very little sugar, exercise, get plenty of rest, hydrate, don't over-schedule, breathe deeply, take my meds as prescribed (Ive been missing doses for weeks...how could I not see how all of this was related? Missing meds, increased irritability, excessive eating and spending. All classic symptoms that I've been diagnosing for years!), call my shrink by the end of the week if I'm not able to rein it in.
I feel very vulnerable sharing this but, if I can't share it with you ladies, then, who?
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