The easiest way to avoid regrets is to ask yourself this question, "If not now, when?" It's a powerful way to put life and our decisions about how we spend our time into perspective"
Update
Posted by Beverly on 11/11/2025, 8:08 pm
Life has been a struggle. So much to do.
I have to remove murray from many accounts/things we have. I set up some things. He set up most. To take his name off of an account... I usually have to show a death notice. Even to close our Costco account. (good grief!) We have many automatic payments and they are on a credit card where he is the main person. Mike says the bank will eventually shut it down... but, not right way. I have a list of 50 things to do. I am marking it off bit by bit... and adding more on. I got a credit card in my name from Mike's bank. I'll be able to take Murray off accounts and change the monthly payments to my credit account.. amazon prime, xfinity *cable", Verizon, Condo/Car insurance, AAA, trash/recycling pickup, etc.
I am working on getting a different health plan because ours is closing at the end of december. I found someone thru a friend. She is very helpful. I asked a lot of questions Many of my medications are no longer covered. I have to get that figured out with some doctors. Things are going to be more expensive. I will probably need to change some medications. Ugh,
I feel lonely... I have people ... but,no one to turn to and say... "What do you think of this... I got Princess Molly a nice cat condo. She's getting into it. Some new toys. She feels the change too,
I don't feel very well. My Crohn's is in a tizzy. I've been throwing up and diarrhea. For months. TMI.. sorry. Trying to cut out dairy.. maybe that will help. I've been eating way too much and the wrong things. I 'played with my m medication' At the first sign of nausea, I took my no throw up medicine. If I had a hint of diarrhea, I took anti poop pills.-- so that I could be with Murray in the hospital and along the way, All my joints are hurting, too.
I cry.
I am feeling weary
I appreciate all the love you show and have for me,
Love you so much, friend
Posted by Krista on 11/12/2025, 9:12 am, in reply to "Update"
I am glad you are talking to us and sharing all you are going through. It helps to talk, I know. I can't even being to imagine all you are going through, Beverly. I am sending my love and my prayers. As always, I wish I had a magic wand to make those health issues go away.
We're here for you ... I just wish we could be physically. I love you.
Thanks for the love. Yes, it's a good idea to talk about it. You are right.
(((Beverly)))
Posted by Joan on 11/12/2025, 6:32 am, in reply to "Update"
I can't even imagine all you're going through right now. I know from previous deaths in my own family that at first it seems non-stop and never ending, one thing after another to check off the list! Everyday was like... what's next on the list?
And, I was exhausted and weary!
I'm sorry you don't feel well on top of everything.
I wish I could help! Just praying, and praying, and praying, and praying...
Joan
Posted by Beverly on 11/12/2025, 10:03 pm, in reply to "(((Beverly)))"
Thanks for all those prayers, dear friend.
I must freshen up... really just make a new list.
My sweet friend…
Posted by Cindy on 11/12/2025, 1:17 am, in reply to "Update"
You have so much on your plate right now. I agree with what has been said -you need to concentrate on your health right now. I know it’s easier said than done. Love that you have a list and can work on things as you feel up to it. I know it’s a lot.
We all love you so much Beverly. Never forget that. (((((HUGS)))))
Cindy
Posted by Beverly on 11/12/2025, 10:20 pm, in reply to "My sweet friend…"
Thanks so much for all your love and caring, Cindy. I know I need to concentrate of my health... there's so much to do.
It's the cost of health care.... it's really got to me changing health plans. I am talking to a very knowlegeble person. It's just the so many drugs are not covered now.
I love you too.
Oh, ((Beverly))
Posted by Delta on 11/12/2025, 12:36 am, in reply to "Update"
Of course, you are struggling. It is understandable. You have had so many major shocks/knocks in the last several weeks that it would be difficult for anyone. They always tell us not to make major decisions during this time, but now, at your most vulnerable, and when your mind is the fuzziest, you have a whole list of things to make decisions about. It's not fair. You have a great helper in Mike; lean on him.
Try to put most of your energy into taking care of yourself and getting your Crohn's flare settled down. That is going to be extra hard while you are under all this emotional upheaval. Concentrating on what you know helps.
As far as all the other, don't worry about a timeline for most of it. As long as you have talked with Social Security about being able to get Murray's Social Security unless you made more than he did, and you decide on insurance by Dec. 7th (it's great that you have someone knowledgeable to help there), don't worry about rushing the rest.
Take care of yourself and know we are here. I wish I could come help you go around and do all this stuff.
Delta
Posted by Beverly on 11/13/2025, 10:03 am, in reply to "Oh, ((Beverly))"
I need to take care of myself, yes. It's hard when there's so much to do. I will make a new list in the morning. I have 'stuff' and info written down all over the place.
I have to figure out this stomach approach to getting it better...
I appreciate your thoughts so much.
You are so helpful, thank you.
Love.
(((((Beverly)))))
Posted by Paula on 11/11/2025, 8:29 pm, in reply to "Update"
How could you NOT be feeling all these things? What a tremendous loss and, like I said before, you have all this love and support. It is a huge help, but, there is a piece of this grief that is yours alone. Please prioritize your health. There's no rush to get all this paperwork crap done. Focus on getting better.
Love you
Paula
Posted by Beverly on 11/13/2025, 10:10 am, in reply to "(((((Beverly)))))"
Thank you for reminding me of the love and support here. I know it... sometimes it's even hard to do that. I appreciate your thoughts in all this. You are such a dear friend. Love you.
Some new toys. She feels the change too, 