Many, sadly.

I am having so much anxiety. I didn't realize it, really. I have been crying, anxious, even trembling about anything. I am totally overwhelmed.

There is so much to do upon Murray's death. I used to take care of bills, etc until we moved back to Michigan. He just put everything on autopay. It's always not so easy to switch them. So at first I figured out a way to get into accounts and just pay. However, there are many I have to delete Murray and reopen in my name and put on autopay. It's time to get it done. Plus he put things his own business credit card and, although I am on it, it is his and will close eventually when they find out he had passed away. The thought of this has me overwhelmed. So many messages still come to his email. I have his phone. I need to put the 'close' on it all.

I have too many health problems. I pulled my hamstring again. I pulled it right before Murray passed away. It took a couple of months to heal. But I did it again a couple of weeks ago...... My foot gets callous's. Podiatrist is shaving them off every 4 weeks. She has had a baby. I saw the other podiatrist and he sent me to get a new arch arthotic. I hope it helps. Of course my insurance doesn't pay anything now..... My ears are ringing so loud. I've had very mild tinnitus in the past. This is very bad.... my hair is falling out.... Right before we moved back to Michigan, I had got a dental bridge attached and one as a removeable partial. The partail ended up not fitting that well and I stopped using it. I have been partially using my front teeth to chew. The result is I have a huge overbite from the pushing and my tmj hurts....... I have neuropathy in both feet because I am PRE diabetic, thus,more and more need to use something to help keep my balance.

Enough, Thus, I have lots of medical things to figure out and deal with. Depressing and painful. I never like to talk about it all. I don't like to focus and talk about it much but... I cant deal with it all now.

I see my primary next week and will talk to her about all this... anxiety, being overwhelmed, pain, depression, trembling and so much. I will see if I can ask Mike to help me with paperwork stuff.

I feel so very weary of it all.




I hope it makes sense.